Having been raised Southern Baptist I am fairly confident that none of my ministers wanted to tell me any of this, but if they had I probably would not have walked away when I did. I remember wishing there was some secret Sunday School class where they taught that the creation stories of Genesis and the apocalypses of Daniel and John were never intended to be read literally. That the Bible's statements about slavery and homosexuality and the role of women can only be understood within the historical context in which they were written. That Heaven and Hell are metaphors for a life lived with love, kindness, and generosity as apposed to a life thrown in the garbage in pursuit of materialism and indulgence. That God is a face we project on the universe in hopes of understanding the incomprehensible. But of course there is no such Sunday School class and no one should entertain such mad heresy.